Tuesday, October 12, 2010

More Random Quotes

Some more random quotes that I have collected over the years:

The cow is nothing but a machine that makes grass fit for
us people to eat.

Recession is when your neighbor loses his job.
Depression is when you lose your job.

When more and more people are thrown out of work, unemployment results.

Anywhere is walking distance, if you've got the time.
-- Me

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and a
dark side, and it holds the universe together.

There are three ways to get something done:

1. Do it yourself.
2. Hire someone to do it for you.
3. Forbid your kids to do it.

The probability of someone watching you is proportional to
the stupidity of your action.

An effective way to deal with predators is to taste terrible.

Die, v.: To stop sinning suddenly.

Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to
borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

Winter is the season in which people try to keep the house
as warm as it was in the summer, when they complained about the heat.

Peace be with you.

9 comments:

  1. I liked those quotes, Joe, especially the "Me" quote...so very true.
    What a great start to the day!
    B :)

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  2. i Like Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time. Now these are words to live by....if I only had the time!

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  3. LOVE this one "Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, and a
    dark side, and it holds the universe together."

    Duct tape is the bomb baby!

    :)

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  4. The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action; LOVe it

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  5. I would use #3 on ways to get something done, but my kids are too clever and would spot the ploy immediately!

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  6. these are all great, but the walking distance one is my favorite!

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  7. I agree with everyone on the walking distance one, I do like that one and sad to say forbidding your kids to do it is a really good way to get something done.

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  8. I like the last one. I'm always amazed that people turn their AC to 70 degrees in the summer. That feels like winter to me!

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  9. I love all of them, especially the winter one (which is so completely true!) and that the more you do something stupid, the more people there are looking at you!

    I'm still laughing at the two definitions near the bottom of the post :P

    It's really such a nice way to start a day :D

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